Interdependent Relationship And How To Get There - Guy Counseling
This is what has been termed as a codependent relationship, which sadly, What an interdependent relationship looks like is that where both. Having interdependence in a relationship is often recognized as the healthiest form of an intimate relationship. misjon.info defines interdependence as “the . Relationships are something that needs to be worked on - not some magic wand that makes A healthy romantic relationship is based on interdependence.
Certain elements make a strong emotional connection and a stable relationship while others tear it down. It is like the Tolstoy quote: There are three different kinds of relationship: This is a term coined by the late Dr. Stephen Covey and we will borrow this classification for the article being. These codependent relationships are not only a classification for romantic relationships, but also for every single relationship we have.
Family, friends and even business relationship can and most of them fall into this category. A codependent relationship is a relationship where both sides are not good enough or complete enough by themselves so they need to find someone else out there a family member, friend or a boyfriend or girlfriend to fill a hole in them and make them whole. If this above sounded romantic in your head, it means that the mainstream media has succeeded.
Every single god damn romantic movie we have seen has had a codependent relationship be the main type of relationship. And even worse, they show that kind of a relationship as a successful, happy and fulfilling one! This is one of the most damaging things out there. Because there are a plethora of guys like you and me who grew up thinking that those movies showed us what we need to know and how we need to behave to happy.
And the movies always portray some super insecure guy who in a miraculous way gets the girl, loses the girl and gets the girl back all the while having so much drama around him, her and their entire relationship. But the reason Hollywood portrays this kind of relationship is drama.
A codependent relationship is full of drama, crazy and unexpected things happening and occurring. They are simply fun to watch because there are a million reasons they could go wrong remember the Tolstoy quote. Codependent people All of us have, in form or another, been in a codependent relationship.
That is just we humans make it in this world. When you are an infant, you are not self-sustainable, you need your parents to give you shelter, provide you with food and water just so you can survive. But the problem occurs when we transfer this kind of behavior in our relationships later on.
What Does Interdependence Look Like in a Relationship?
When you are starting to grow up and still displays behaviors of an infantthen you will surely end up in a codependent relationship. If not with your parents, then with other people around you. Codependent people are not self-sufficient, they usually live in a state of 0 control of their lives, they have a deep victim mentality someone else is responsible for my life and complain quite a lot.
This means that all of our needs are to be met by someone else because we, as individuals, are not capable of doing that by ourselves.
We seek someone out there to gives us a job because we want someone else to be responsible for us. We seek out friends who will only tell us nice things and go with the flow because our self-confidence would otherwise shatter to pieces.
What Does Interdependence Look Like in a Relationship? | Synonym
And when you turn around left and right, you see people like this everywhere. Because there would be someone else who we could point a finger. A codependent relationship is the same- you always blame the other person when things go awry, they never love or respect you enough and the entire fault for everything in a relationship is always their fault.
I will give you a quick shortcut to get to stage 2 — independent relationship. There may be times when one person in a relationship makes a sacrifice. For example, if one partner gets a job that is a great opportunity but involves moving to another city, the other person may also move. In an interdependent relationship, the partner with a new job will likely reciprocate, making a sacrifice for the other person.
It is also helpful to focus on the gains provided by the relationship instead of focusing solely on the cost.
Maintaining an Individual Identity One way of ensuring that your relationship is on the road to interdependence is to maintain your own identity as an individual as well as a couple. According to Joleen Watson, a couples counselor, people in interdependent relationships recognize the importance of keeping their identity outside of marriage and feel confident expressing their opinions while still being sensitive to the other person.
You maintain your identity through work, friendships or involvement in activities that you engage in independently. In order to avoid becoming disconnected from your partner, balance your independence with time spent together on activities you both enjoy.
Investing in Relationships Interdependent relationships require effort, nurturing and healthy boundaries. Gaining awareness of your own needs and goals is an important step toward reciprocity in relationships.